The one bit of advice that got me through the early weeks and months of breastfeeding, by Gabrielle Gray.
Apply yourself to being confident in 3 ways:
First, be confident to listen to your own instincts, intuition and natural reactions to things that go on with your baby. My mum told me ‘you are built to do this’, so be confident in your ability to learn and adapt to your baby and go on your own, unique journey.
Second, and equally as important, be confident to ask – and equally as confident not to ask if you don’t feel the need! You can ask for any reason, without the need to do anything with the answer you get.
Maybe you ask because you actually don’t know the answer, or because you’d like different options, or extra information, or because you need help or validation… all these reasons are totally okay. Or maybe you want to hear other people’s crazy opinions so you can walk away thinking ‘yep, I’m good with my choice because they all sound ridiculous’. What you do with the ‘answer’ is up to you, it’s your story and you can write it.
Finally, be confident about telling people ‘no’ in all areas. I was really firm with people who offered me unsolicited advice, or who overstepped boundaries in their commentary or actions.
I made it very clear that if I wanted their advice or opinion (or even their intervention at times), I would most certainly ask, but that my husband and I felt confident and equipped, and well supported by our trusted support people to make good decisions about what is best for our kids. I know that can be tricky if you’re a personality who worries about ‘offending people’ (not me obviously), but if you make your expectations and boundaries clear to people from the start i think it simplifies things in the long run.
Peace & love mamas!